A Tragic Sense of Life

It took Father Roman D. Roldan almost forty years to sit down and actually write Alex’s story. He was concerned that he was beginning to forget the small details, concerned even that he might forget Alex. He owed it to his friend to tell his story. And as it turned out, he owed it to himself as well.

It hadn’t seemed so imperative when he had first left Colombia to live in New Jersey or, later, Iowa, when he was spending twenty-five years doing social work, or when he was raising a family. It was only when he moved to St. Francisville, Louisiana, that those memories began to flood his consciousness more and more. 

What was it about Louisiana that so inspired him? Perhaps it was that the culture here was so very similar to that of Colombia where he grew up—family oriented, with the church at the center of the community and the priest a part of everything in that community. (He had wanted to be a Catholic priest since he was nine years old, but when he realized he could not marry in that priesthood, he became the next closest thing…an Episcopal minister, with a wife and four children.)

[Read this: Our new Poet Laureate, John Warner Smith.]

Thus was born A Blind Man and His Monkey, written by Father Roman D. Roldan, social worker, clergyman at St. Francisville’s Grace Episcopal Church, Doctor of Theology, and world traveler, who now adds author to his list of accomplishments, all of which he says are interconnected. The biographical novel tells a story of love and grief, of the pain of losing a loved one to suicide, and it examines the title’s suggestion of co-dependency. 

The biographical novel tells a story of love and grief, of the pain of losing a loved one to suicide, and it examines the title’s suggestion of co-dependency. 

A Blind Man and His Monkey is set in Medellin, Colombia, where Father Roldan grew up during the dreadful reign of terror created by Pablo Escobar and his drug cartel. With street violence, kidnappings, corruption, and dead bodies floating down rivers or rotting on garbage hills, Medellin was one of the most dangerous cities in the world at the time. All this senseless death, says the author, resulted in a deep depression which fell over the entire city. No one was spared, regardless of age or social class or location. It was a time when everyone suffered from what writer Miguel de Unamuno called “a tragic sense of life,” surrounded by fear and horror. 

Serving as a surrogate for the author, main character Joe Cardenas, in residence in 1981 at a school for boys who felt called to the priesthood, is described as “religiously conservative, socially awkward, fearful of the future, insecure about his short stature, and eager to please, especially those he considers his superiors,” the seventh of eight children in a low-middle class family. 

His roommate Alex is the opposite—tall, handsome, wealthy, gregarious, and sophisticated, from a prominent family but with a “darkness” in his heart that ultimately leads him to suicide. A final drunken late-night phone call (“Joe, I’ll see you when I wake”), a request, and a mysterious letter full of clues lead young Joe to delve into a dark and dangerous world of drugs and international sex trafficking. If there was anything Colombia was known for besides cocaine, it was sex tourism, and the author has deftly woven details of that sordid side of Colombia’s reputation in with the real story of the young boy’s suicide and his own heartbreak. 

A fast-paced page-turner written as if Joe were addressing his dead friend, the book ends with an assurance that Alex’s parents miss him, but “I know time will heal their wounds, as it will heal Colombia’s own wounds. I am a person of faith, and hope is the last resort of the faithful.” And he adds, “After the tragic events of December 1981, I am certain of only two things: First, life is precious, and we need to hold on to those we love. Second, I can’t wait to see you when we wake.”

" ... First, life is precious, and we need to hold on to those we love. Second, I can’t wait to see you when we wake.”

All clergymen, Father Roldan explains, are storytellers. This may be true, but not all clergymen can write as well as Father Roldan can. This definitely won’t be his last book; he’s already working on another, but this first book he found to be tremendously cathartic and therapeutic, a rediscovery and enhanced appreciation of his roots, a final fulfillment of his promise to his beloved roommate. 

He will continue to weave together all the various facets of his life experience as background tapestry for his stories, just as they influence his ministry. His background in social work and his years in the priesthood have instilled in him a deep understanding of and compassion for grief and loss, especially in connection with the tragic impact of suicide, not only on the deceased, but most especially on the guilt-stricken survivors. His upbringing in Colombia, with its culture of family and community closeness, likewise has inspired him to reach out to help in times of crises and natural disasters. He serves as the diocesan relief coordinator, and at Grace Episcopal, he has helped provide assistance and supplies, as well as plenty of manual labor, in response to floods and hurricanes.

His St. Francisville community, home to creative souls like writers and musicians and artists, also inspires his own creativity, allowing him to turn snippets of stories told to his children over the years into a well-written novel, part fact, part fiction, 100% fascinating.  

A Blind Man and His Monkey is available in bookstores and shops in the St. Francisville area, as well other regional outlets, on Amazon (Kindle and paperback), or from the author at R.D. Roldan, Box 3093, St. Francisville, LA, 70775, author.rdroldan@gmail.com, or rdroldan.com.